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SA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization, or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes. We don’t claim it’s for everybody, but for us, it works.
Our primary purpose is to stay sexually sober and help others to achieve sexual sobriety.* Sexaholics Anonymous is a recovery program based on the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous and received permission from AA to use its Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions in 1979. If you identify with us and think you may share our problem, we’d like to share our solution with you (Sexaholics Anonymous, last sentence, page 2).
I was about two years into recovery when my AA sponsor directed me to choose between her and the married man I was having an affair with.
She pointed out that she had nothing to gain either way; after all, wasn’t sleeping with me.
So I went to therapy and I worked the program, but I continued to fill an existential hole with a not-so-spiritual solution. He shrugged, “Because I just found out about it myself.” But in my heart of hearts, I wasn’t in SLAA to recover. I was determined not to keep making the same mistakes.
They said, “God is Love.” I heard, “Love is God.” I was nearing 10 years clean and sober when my therapist handed me a directory for Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. I was there to get well enough to secure a healthy relationship. They said, “A relationship will cure your love addiction about as well as cocaine will cure your drug addiction.” I heard: “You need a boyfriend.” Now that I am aware of my pattern of self-destructive behavior, surely I will do it differently. Turned out, I just made a whole bunch of fresh new mistakes. I’m a smart girl, I figured, and I’ve been working the Steps for years. Turned out, I just made a whole bunch of fresh new mistakes.
In a fit of uncharacteristically good judgment, I chose her.
But you know what Buckaroo Banzai said: “Wherever you go, there you are.” So I stopped sleeping with that particular guy. I made it to seven years of sobriety by, One, working the program and, Two, substituting intoxicating behaviors for intoxicating substances.
If people do not feel that they have an addiction or struggle with any kind of sexual integrity issue, it is more challenging for them to understand the need to have boundaries around their relationship to protect it from anything that can cause it to weaken.The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop lusting and become sexually sober.There are no dues or fees for SA membership; we are self-supporting through our own contributions.INTEGRITY: Most people recovering from sex addiction have learned the benefits and the importance of having integrity in their life.It is essential that they share their feelings appropriately and be truthful with themselves and that they avoid anything that would cause even a hint of suspicion by others.